I have been keeping clothes in my closet, clothes that I hope to fit into one day, some clothes that I wore when I was younger and thinner (ie, before children), and some clothes that I bought because they almost fit right in the store, but when I got them home, I decided they would look better when I lost weight.  They just sit there in the closet, some still with tags, others without.  Every now and then, I get the urge to try them on to see if there has been any “improvement” in my body and they fit better.  And, inevitably, the clothes fit the same as before—not quite right and clinging in all the wrong places.  So, I would body-bash and despair that I would ever find clothes that looked nice.  But, I had some nice clothes that did fit my body, hanging in my closet.  And, I chose to neglect all those in favor of clothes that didn’t fit.  I chose to think that my body was the problem, not the too small clothes.

Anyway, that was the background.  Today, I chose to clean out my closet—to rid myself of all the clothes that don’t fit me and my body—waiting, hoping, dreaming that my body might be something different that what it is.  That is and has been my biggest fear and it has been really holding me back.  So, even though the penny-pincher in me despises it, I have cleaned the clothes out.  I am hoping to begin viewing it as giving the perfectly good clothes to charity, rather than as throwing them away.

So, another manta to add to my growing attack force of positive thoughts is “It’s not my body that’s the problem, it’s the clothes.”

8 thoughts on “CLEANING THE CLOSET

  1. I keep clothes in 4 different sizes because that’s how much my weight has fluctuated over the last 10 years. I keep the smaller sizes in hopes of fitting into them again, but also because they make me think of a happier me. I keep the bigger sizes because when I am that size it’s harder to find clothes I like and that fit right so when I find something, it’s kind of rare so I feel the need to hold on to them. I’m not sure if this is good or bad. ?

    • I definitely don’t think it is bad as long as the clothes that fit a “smaller you” don’t keep taunting you every time you go into the closet, that that “happier me” you mentioned doesn’t mean that you feel ashamed of the present you. Thanks for coming back to my blog! Blessings on your journey, Stacey, and I love seeing how big your little girl is getting!

  2. I quite agree! It’s quite easy to find potential happiness in what we don’t have rather than finding the fulfillment what we do have. Just goes along with saying that the other side of the fence is always greener.

    When it comes to clothes, we focus on the size on the label. But the reality is that while most clothing labels follow a vague standard of sizing, there’s a great deal of variance. Add into that differences with fabrics, and there’s plenty to misguide us. I find this when I shop. When buying shirts, for instance, some brands’ large sizes will fit me best while other brands’ smalls fit me best; I usually wear a medium. In reality, it’s not our bodies, but the clothes.

    • Thanks for your support and words of advice, Matthew. I really like the reminder about the variance in clothing sizes. I should know that better than anyone, but it is difficult to remember in the heat of the moment. I have always thought you have had a wonderful sense of style and appreciate you understanding and commiserating with my dilemma. Blessings!

  3. This is such a good lesson to learn, and Matthew is right, there is HUGE variance. The natural tendency is of course to blame our bodies for not being good enough or thin enough. But I think I’m getting better. I like to think of it in this way: I don’t feel ashamed of my feet for not fitting into my mom’s size 6.5 shoes when I wear an 8.5.

    • Thanks for being so supportive of my journey and adding your experiences. I really like the shoe analogy because I too, have never felt ashamed of my shoe size because it is different than someone else’s–a really great way to think about it! Blessings!

  4. That’s one step I haven’t quite taken yet. That would be hard for me to do. I know whoever gets your clothes will be so grateful, though!

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